Even though we hate buying into the new year, new me bullshit, it’s hard to deny that there isn’t a sudden hit of motivation in Jan.
So, here you are. You’re single and you’re thinking that monogamy may not be for you.
Maybe you’ve gone from one monogamous relationship to another with a sense that something’s missing? And maybe you’ve been thinking about the benefits of a healthy and honest open-relationship with someone. If you are, that’s okay! You’re not unusual, broken, or weird.
Different types of relationships suit different people and you just gotta find what works for you! And no, men don’t like monogamy less than women, in fact, studies have proven that women like it less!
In fact, open-relationships are nothing new. As our society becomes more diverse in a variety of ways including sexually, things start to become more socially acceptable (hallelujah!).
And guess what? Post-millennials have played a huge role in this (YAY!), according to Pew Research Center. They’ve managed to transform what satisfying intimate relationships look like and SPOILER ALERT: they look a hell of a lot more diverse than they did in our parents’ generation.
But, like, are open-relationships healthy?
Yep! In fact, they’re just as healthy as monogamous relationships.
Back in 2018, a study by the University of Guelph confirmed that people in open-relationships are just as happy as their monogamous counterparts!
The open-relationships we’re referring to aren’t the one-sidedly open (if you know what I mean). We’re talking about consensual, non-monogamous relationships where both individuals are in the know.
These types of relationships are actually more common than you think! In fact, 3-7% of people are in non-monogamous relationships in North America.
So, if relationship structure doesn’t matter, what does?
Well, according to the study, it surveyed over 140 people in non-monogamous partnerships and more than 200 in monogamous ones. What it found was that an important predictor of relationship satisfaction isn’t relationship structure but rather sexual motivation.
“Ultimately, if you’re fulfilling your psychological needs and are satisfied sexually, you’re more likely to be happy in your partnership no matter the relationship structure.”Jessica Wood, PhD Student, Lead Author of Study
More data! The brain needs more data!
Researchers studied 1,658 people in relationships and it found that monogamous and consensual non-monogamous groups (so open-relationships) appeared to be high functioning both in their relationships and as individuals. But partially open and one-sided relationships showed lower levels of functioning.
Not only that but both monogamous groups and the consensual non-monogamous group reported low levels of distress and loneliness. Plus, they reported high levels of satisfaction toward their needs, relationship and sexual gratification. Sexual sensation seeking was lowest in the monogamous groups (which, like, makes sense) and highest in the three non-monogamous groups.
👉👉👉It boils down to the fact that mutual consent, comfort, and communication are crucial ingredients—regardless of the type of open relationship.👈👈👈
The research emphasizes that mutual consent, comfort, and communication are important considerations in ANY healthy, sustainable relationship.
Find the relationship type that works for you. If a consensual open-relationship is what you need, go after it and screw the haters!
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