It’s a typical weekday. The birds are chirping, the sun is out, the weather is cooling, the world is basically on fire, world leaders and politics are a shit show annnnd a new dating trend has made its way out of the woodworks: FIREWORKING.
You’re probably glaring at your computer being like HERE WE F***ING GO AGAIN! And you know what, fair. But read on, ’cause like, you’ve probably been fireworked, hell, in retrospect, even I’ve been fireworked.
What is fireworking?
To firework someone is to purposely date someone for the sole reason of showing off for other people. The person fireworking you is either trying to make their ex feel some type of way or they just keep you around as their arm candy. Whatever the reason, you’re being used to stir the pot! To make a splash! To drink the tea!
And some of you are probably sitting there right now thinking, “f***k yeah, I’ve been fireworked, it just means I’m hot enough to be fireworked”.
Well, yeah, you are.
But like, give yourself 30 seconds for the bad feelings to start sinking in causing you to wonder what’s so deeply wrong with you that no one is giving you a chance at a real relationship…
Sorry. Maybe we should all take that slap in the face as a friendly reminder to book an appointment with our therapist lol
How do I tell I’m being fireworked?
There are a few telltale signs of fireworking:
- Does your partner plaster you all over their social media but has never really talked about “what you guys are” or are they less affectionate in person without other people around?
- If your partner seems to care more about how you two LOOK to other people, then they’re probably just fireworking you.
What do I do now that I know I’m being fireworked?
Firstly, probably don’t confront them by saying “I KNOW YOU’RE FIREWORKING ME” because, odds are, unless they’ve seen this article, they’ll have no idea what you’re talking about. Plus, attacking someone off the bat is never a good way to go lmao.
Secondly, just ask! Ask what’s going on by telling them how you feel.
General tip: for any confrontation, opening the issue with "I feel..." makes it so that the person you're talking to doesn't feel
It shifts the conversation from YOU DID THIS BAD THING to this is how your actions are making me feel.
So, you're not attacking them as a person, but their actions, because let's face it: actions have consequences and your feelings are valid.
Remember, they may not be doing this maliciously nor may the be even aware of it! So, letting them know that their actions make you feel bad, will help guide the conversation with an empathetic tone for both of you.
Go forth, young padawan. Take what you’ve learned and run with it!